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Just me.
I miscarried in June. I was 10 weeks pregnant. I'm still heartsick over it. How long will I feel normal again? I have a lot of guilt and feel I have cursed my baby. I didn't want to be pregnant at all since I had 2 children and one was only 9 months old when I found out. Now, I miss my baby and wish I hadn't been so stressed and sick over this. I would give anything I could to have my unborn baby back. I'm sure things would have worked out but I just couldn't see it then.
Does anyone know if nursing possibly causes miscarriage? My son was still nursing at the time. I feel maybe I was too stressed and caused my own miscarriage. I also drank tea and maybe shouldn't have.
I've gone to the Dr afterwards to 'talk' about it. He just said I should be glad I didn't have a handicapped child since they are difficult to take care of.
Answer
My heart goes out to you. In November of 2005 I had a sonogram and was told that I was having triplets....I already had two children and two step children but my husband and I wanted just one more. I couldn't believe that I was going to have three! We would be going from a family of 6 to a family of 9! I stressed out about money, time, etc. etc. but I knew that somehow we would make it. I immediately began to stock up on everything that we would need. Then in the first week of December, I starting having a brownish pink discharge. We went to the ER right away, and during the sonogram they wouldn't even let me look at the monitor. All three of my babies had died...I felt horrible. They sent me home and scheduled with my OB to do a D&C three days later. For three days, I sat in the nursery and just cried my heart out. I felt like I had done something wrong...like I could have prevented it somehow. It was even harder when I had to go for 3 days knowing that I was carrying around these babies that weren't even alive. Before the D& C the doctor did another ultrasound and determined that the babies had actually stopped developing a few weeks before that and that my body had not rejected the pregnancy yet so I was still producing amniotic fluid. After the D&C I would sit on the floor of our shower and just watch the blood go down the drain...it was awful. I didn't think that I would ever recover from it. I would cry everyday, I couldn't go to work, I didn't eat or sleep and I could swear at night that I could hear them crying. I know that this is an awful awful story...but there is a point to it... After the first few weeks, I started to feel a little better, and I really opened up the lines of communication with my husband and then a few more weeks had passed and I started to have some good days, then eventuelly there were more good than bad. I read alot of books about miscarriage and multiple pregnancies and birth defects and genetic disorders. I just needed an answer to why this happened....but ya know what?? There wasn't one. A huge percentage of pregnancies end in miscarriage. Some women even have multiple miscarriages and they still go on to have healthy pregnancies. As long as you were not doing heavy drugs or were an alcoholic.....then there was nothing that you could have done differently. Your body knew that this was not a viable embryo and instead of giving you a child with major complications and deformities....you miscarried. If you decide to try again....do. I am happy to day that after all of my heartache and pain...I am now 30 weeks along with one very healthy and active baby girl.....she is perfect. God knew that this is what I needed.
I wish you all the luck in the world and you are welcome to contact me directly if you need some support.
My heart goes out to you. In November of 2005 I had a sonogram and was told that I was having triplets....I already had two children and two step children but my husband and I wanted just one more. I couldn't believe that I was going to have three! We would be going from a family of 6 to a family of 9! I stressed out about money, time, etc. etc. but I knew that somehow we would make it. I immediately began to stock up on everything that we would need. Then in the first week of December, I starting having a brownish pink discharge. We went to the ER right away, and during the sonogram they wouldn't even let me look at the monitor. All three of my babies had died...I felt horrible. They sent me home and scheduled with my OB to do a D&C three days later. For three days, I sat in the nursery and just cried my heart out. I felt like I had done something wrong...like I could have prevented it somehow. It was even harder when I had to go for 3 days knowing that I was carrying around these babies that weren't even alive. Before the D& C the doctor did another ultrasound and determined that the babies had actually stopped developing a few weeks before that and that my body had not rejected the pregnancy yet so I was still producing amniotic fluid. After the D&C I would sit on the floor of our shower and just watch the blood go down the drain...it was awful. I didn't think that I would ever recover from it. I would cry everyday, I couldn't go to work, I didn't eat or sleep and I could swear at night that I could hear them crying. I know that this is an awful awful story...but there is a point to it... After the first few weeks, I started to feel a little better, and I really opened up the lines of communication with my husband and then a few more weeks had passed and I started to have some good days, then eventuelly there were more good than bad. I read alot of books about miscarriage and multiple pregnancies and birth defects and genetic disorders. I just needed an answer to why this happened....but ya know what?? There wasn't one. A huge percentage of pregnancies end in miscarriage. Some women even have multiple miscarriages and they still go on to have healthy pregnancies. As long as you were not doing heavy drugs or were an alcoholic.....then there was nothing that you could have done differently. Your body knew that this was not a viable embryo and instead of giving you a child with major complications and deformities....you miscarried. If you decide to try again....do. I am happy to day that after all of my heartache and pain...I am now 30 weeks along with one very healthy and active baby girl.....she is perfect. God knew that this is what I needed.
I wish you all the luck in the world and you are welcome to contact me directly if you need some support.
How would you cope with the fact your baby was going to be hooked up to all these machines???
Q. My three triplets are going to be premature . Just starring at the babies through the window hooked up to all those wires and machines and tubes just made my heart sink. How would you cope with the fact that one of your babies might die ? I and my husband are having a really hard time dealing with this I need help please help!
Answer
Here is my story:
I had twins - they were born at 37 weeks which is considered full-term for twins. Unfortunately, my daughter had aortic stenosis which is a heart defect where the aortic valve is too narrow for good blood flow. They found the defect on an ultrasound at 18 weeks . . . During the whole pregnancy she was monitored and we knew that there was a chance that they would need to deliver her even earlier than 37 weeks (also risking my other twins life) if her heart issue became worse.
Immediately after birth, I got to see her for a moment before she was triaged and wisked away to Children's Hospital. They performed heart surgery on her the very next day - she was only 5lbs 1 oz. She spent 10 days in the hospital hooked up to breathing tubes, feeding tubes and heart monitors. For the first couple of days she was in a medically induced coma. She didn't look real - more like a doll than a baby.
I was at the hospital across the street with my son, recovering from the c-section while my daughter was at a different hospital. I had to send my son to the nursery and request a wheelchair so that family members could take me across the street to see my daughter. I spent a lot of time alone in my room with my son as my husband and parents were with my daughter - she just seemed to need them more. It was the most difficult time of my life.
In the end - my twins are currently napping in their bouncy chairs at this very moment - they are now 4 months old. My son is just fine and my daughter still has a heart issue (she will always have one) but she is currently fine and she sees a cardiologist regularly to make sure that she continues to do fine or to schedule surgery in the future if it becomes neccessary.
I know that you are probably stressed and I know that it is hard to deal with . . . I wish that I had the magic answer for you . . .
Here is my advice - find doctors that you like, tour the NICU so that you will know where your triplets might be, take really good care of yourself - the longer they are in you . . . the better. Don't dwell on the what ifs and the worst case scenarios . . . women have had triplets and they have been just fine. They might not be hooked up to any machines. I joined a support group for parents of multiples before I had my twins (you can do a google search for multiples support groups in your area)- it helped a lot to know other women that have been through it. After that just take it day by day and build your support system with family and friends.
You and your husband WILL get through this . . . parents don't have a choice. You simply do it, you simply get through it . . . and it will always pull at your heartstrings and bring tears to your eyes when you look back on it. If you are religious, prayer never hurt!
Feel free to email me through my profile - I am sending you loads of positive thoughts!
Here is my story:
I had twins - they were born at 37 weeks which is considered full-term for twins. Unfortunately, my daughter had aortic stenosis which is a heart defect where the aortic valve is too narrow for good blood flow. They found the defect on an ultrasound at 18 weeks . . . During the whole pregnancy she was monitored and we knew that there was a chance that they would need to deliver her even earlier than 37 weeks (also risking my other twins life) if her heart issue became worse.
Immediately after birth, I got to see her for a moment before she was triaged and wisked away to Children's Hospital. They performed heart surgery on her the very next day - she was only 5lbs 1 oz. She spent 10 days in the hospital hooked up to breathing tubes, feeding tubes and heart monitors. For the first couple of days she was in a medically induced coma. She didn't look real - more like a doll than a baby.
I was at the hospital across the street with my son, recovering from the c-section while my daughter was at a different hospital. I had to send my son to the nursery and request a wheelchair so that family members could take me across the street to see my daughter. I spent a lot of time alone in my room with my son as my husband and parents were with my daughter - she just seemed to need them more. It was the most difficult time of my life.
In the end - my twins are currently napping in their bouncy chairs at this very moment - they are now 4 months old. My son is just fine and my daughter still has a heart issue (she will always have one) but she is currently fine and she sees a cardiologist regularly to make sure that she continues to do fine or to schedule surgery in the future if it becomes neccessary.
I know that you are probably stressed and I know that it is hard to deal with . . . I wish that I had the magic answer for you . . .
Here is my advice - find doctors that you like, tour the NICU so that you will know where your triplets might be, take really good care of yourself - the longer they are in you . . . the better. Don't dwell on the what ifs and the worst case scenarios . . . women have had triplets and they have been just fine. They might not be hooked up to any machines. I joined a support group for parents of multiples before I had my twins (you can do a google search for multiples support groups in your area)- it helped a lot to know other women that have been through it. After that just take it day by day and build your support system with family and friends.
You and your husband WILL get through this . . . parents don't have a choice. You simply do it, you simply get through it . . . and it will always pull at your heartstrings and bring tears to your eyes when you look back on it. If you are religious, prayer never hurt!
Feel free to email me through my profile - I am sending you loads of positive thoughts!
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Title Post: How long does it take to get over a miscarriage?
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Thanks For Coming To My Blog
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